


The Monster That Guards My Dreams

by Mothman_Is_My_Lord



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Bees, Dreams, M/M, True Form Castiel, True Form Michael
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-29
Updated: 2019-04-29
Packaged: 2020-02-09 14:53:24
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,955
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18640366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mothman_Is_My_Lord/pseuds/Mothman_Is_My_Lord
Summary: Dean's been having strange dreams about a friendly giant with four heads.It takes him awhile to put two and two together.





	The Monster That Guards My Dreams

**Author's Note:**

> This is very unedited so I'm sorry in advanced. I'll probably go back through and make it better on a later date.

Without even sparing a glance at the clock, Dean slung his duffle over his shoulder and stalked to his bedroom. During the last hour of twelve he was starting to feel drowsy, sluggish, and downright exhausted. It wasn’t a difficult hunt, to say the least, but nonetheless leaving both Winchester’s tired in the end. 

Neither of the brother’s bid each other goodnight in favor of hitting their beds sooner. In an all time record, Dean took a shower, changed into a clean shirt and boxers, and practically passed out on his memory foam mattress. Four hours is all he prayed for. Four hours of nothing or peaceful dreams. 

Nightmares had a habit of plaguing every dream of Dean’s. Sometimes everything would start our relatively peaceful, not a shed of darkness in sights. Then the dream turned into one of Dean’s worst nightmares, killing someone he loves or reminding him of all the shit him and his family have been through. Everything bad had a habit of weaving in and out of his mind- causing him a night of restless sleep, almost better off with no sleep at all. 

His dream self manifested behind the steering wheel of the impala. Forests on either side of a long backroad breezed by in a green blur. Baby’s engine whirred as it was pushed at high speeds down the lonely road, not a single car or person in sight. Just him, baby, and the road beneath her tires.

Dean couldn’t help but grin. So far so good, he thought and turned up the dial. Led Zeppelin’s “Ramble On” blasted through the speakers. It was as if he were listening to the song while conscious. None of the words blended together as his brain forgot the words. They flowed from the speakers one by one, vocals and instrumentals in perfect harmony as Dean remembered. 

Tapping his hands along to the beat on the steering wheel, Dean relaxed into the all too familiar seat and basked in the tranquility. For once, Michael wasn’t banging within the depths of his mind, there was no particular life dangering scenario that sent his nerves over the edge. Everything was just as he expected sleep to go- rejuvenating, peaceful, and refreshing. 

It was as if nothing could damper his feeling. Nothing his mind could muster could possibly take the comfort of the road and his car away from him. Of course, the only thing that could possibly make this dream better would be surrounded by his family but either way, this was still nice.

A heavy rumble that could challenge an earthquake shook the ground beneath Baby’s tires. Frowning, Dean slowly elevated his foot off the gas and turned down the radio just as Robert Plant was entering the second chorus. The hunter glanced at the road every few seconds but tried to focus his attention to the trees surrounding him, looking for any visible sign of an earthquake or disturbance. 

Everything was silent- not a single bird chirped, branches didn’t sway in the wind- it was as if the forest was afraid to move.

Thump. Thump.

Dean made a face as he wracked his brain for any logical answer. Earthquakes didn’t go thump thump- hell, nothing in nature made that noise as far as Dean was concerned. What kind of game is my mind playing on me? Is this one of those dreams where some monster from a movie hunts me down in a natural environment and then I’m forced to wake up in a fit? 

He’d never had that issue. No matter what movie he watched, they never gave him nightmares. His nightmare’s were strictly limited to hunting, his low self-esteem, and the fears he refused to tell anyone.

This time, the trees shook with the tremors. Dean was forced to pull over. Driving while everything shook around him (including the impala) was a difficult task and the last thing he wanted to do was shoot awake because he was forced to drive into a tree trunk (though, that’d be a lot better than falling off a cliff and waking up just before you hit the ground).

Shutting of the engine, Dean waited silently for the rumbling to stop. They were paced, one after another in a walking pattern. Hunting instincts nearly forced him to grab the shotgun from the back of the trunk before he quickly turned it away. This was just a dream. Maybe if it came down to a last resort Dean will probably grab a weapon but right now, whatever was heading his way must’ve been ten times bigger than him. Most of his weapons would barely put a mark on it.

Dean lost track of how long he sat there in the impala. He was about to put the keys back in the ignition and take off in the opposite direction when he saw something just over the trees. The hunter blinked a few times before zeroing in on what he thought he saw.

From here he could roughly make out the head...s? Plural? Dean blinked again before nearly lying along the bench so he could see without the roof of the car getting in his way. The first head he saw was white and resembled a human head in a way. It was almost as if someone was wearing a plain white mask and the only part of their face you could see was two glowing blue eyes. The head next to the human one on the right was black and white striped. A zebra, Dean soon realized. The other two on the left of the human head was a grey wolf and a stag. 

As more of the body came into view, the giant didn’t seem to have tons of muscle- it actually looked more on the lanky side. There wasn’t a lot of meat to it’s long bones but there was a certain power that radiated off it nonetheless. What really caught Dean’s attention was the six humongous black wings that almost made the giant seem small in comparison. They were frayed- feathers stripped and mainly just wing bones- but still the most beautiful things Dean’s ever seen.

The giant placed a foot on the road (Dean hadn’t realized it got so close), and instead of swinging it’s foot ahead of the other, it came to a stop right besides the other. Standing in place a few yards ahead of Dean, the hunter- although he couldn’t see the giant’s heads due to the hood of his car) could sense that the monster was staring in his direction. 

It was one of those moments where Dean realizes he should probably high tail it out of there and that he’s most likely screwed but he couldn’t bring himself to. Instead- like an idiot- Dean unlocked his door and stepped out. He had to crane his neck upwards to see the monster’s heads. He was glad he didn’t have to worry about the effect of the sun on his eyes or else this’d be torture on his eyesight. 

In person, the giant was much bigger. Roughly, it was the size of a skyscraper in New York that seemed to touch the clouds above it. The winged giant stared at Dean but made no move to run or attack him. The two polar opposites just stood there, merely feet away, one the size of an ant compared to another, and just started at each other. There was nothing unnerving about it (strangely), but it filled Dean with comfort. It was like coming face to face with a friendly giant, almost.

Even if Dean wasn’t sure how friendly this thing was.

Before he could find out, a loud pounding on his door pulled him from his dream. Dean paid little attention to his brother yelling his name in favor of staring at the ceiling in confusion. His encounter didn’t leave him gasping for air as he jolted out of bed. Unlike most dreams, Dean just opened his eyes without any rush or desperation for a nightmare to end. It was calm, despite the giant thousand foot monster than left him alone.

What the hell?

***

Groaning, Dean dropped onto the crappy motel bed and rubbed his eyes. His headache and the lights were starting to screw with his eyes. He’s been up for over twenty four hours now, been thrown into a wall by a werewolf, and running up and this unfamiliar town to try and find the bitch before she kills anyone else.

Needless to say: Dean needed a damn break.

The sound of keys turning notified Dean that Sam had hopefully returned with two cups of coffee for their next round of tracking. However, instead of his brother’s heavy steps there were lighter ones and the quietly made their way to Dean.

Yawning, Dean looked at his trench coat wearing angel. “Heya, Cas. How’s it going?” Cas didn’t reply for a minute, eyes roaming over Dean to take in the hunter’s current state of health. When his ocean eyes met Dean’s again, a spark of familiarity flushed over the human. Sure, Cas has stared at him before-the awkward little guy does it fairly often- but this time was different. It left a bigger imprint on Dean than any of the other times. 

“You’ve exhausted yourself.” Cas stated. “When was the last time you slept?” 

“Uhhh, a little over a day.” Dean wasn’t exactly sure. Everything seemed to blend together at this point, and the only solid thought he could muster was a mix between: “I’m tired” and “Cas has beautiful eyes”.

“Dean, you need to sleep.” 

“I think I’m passed need, Cas.” Dean said. The hunter stood up to move around in an attempt to keep himself awake. “We’ve got more important things to worry about. A werewolf is about to tear down some poor bastard’s door and-”

“Dean.” Cas’ voice sent a chill through Dean’s bones. It froze the hunter in his tracks. “You. Need. To. Sleep.” The angel left no room for argument. “You and your brother both. But seeing as your brother isn’t here I’ll make sure one of you does so.” 

“Ca-” The steely look that Cas gave him caused his rebuttal to die half way off his tongue. “Alright, jesus. I’m going.” Cas, the smug bastard, had the decency to try and look neutral but the victory was etched within his eyes and the way the corner of his mouth tried to turn up. When Dean turned around to grab a clean shirt for bed, he couldn’t help but smile a little before turning back around.

Dean texted Sam before disappearing into the bathroom to prepare for bed. Cas is forcing me to hit the hay. Beware: you’re next. 

Sam’s reply: Damn. If he can get you to bed I don’t stand a chance.

Dean scoffed. Of course Sam would take the opportunity to jab at his stubbornness.

Before Dean stepped out of the bathroom in his normal sleep attire, his hand hesitated. Casting a weary look down at his boxers and the sudden realization that his best friend who he’s been pining over for the past few years was waiting outside suddenly made him very self-conscious. Was this awkward? Between two guys who are best friends and one of them isn’t currently harboring unreciprocated feeling for the other man, maybe. 

Dean’s never struggled with this before. He’s had crushes on girls and he never once reacted this way. Once he discovered his feeling for Cas, everything Dean knew about himself flew out the window. He never got nervous around girls but guys seemed to raise the temperature too high. He never worried about how he looked, or felt the slightest bit shocked when a girl flirted with him. Guys seemed to turn the tables all the time and with Cas- the poor guy didn’t even need to do anything except stand there to make Dean’s heart rate speed up. 

Now he was wide awake and panicking.

Calm down, Winchester. He’s still your best friend despite your other feelings towards him. Buck up. He’s just trying to make sure you don’t work yourself to death.

Taking a deep breath, Dean put on the mask he’s grown too used to wearing and opened the door. Cas sat at the edge of Dean’s borrowed bed, waiting patiently. The angel looked over at Dean- probably reacting to the sound of the door opening- and something flashed within those blue eyes. Dean didn’t know what it was but he shoved it down. 

As Dean moved to lay down on the bed, Cas stood up. The hunter felt something stab at his heart, scared that he somehow startled his friend away. He had a habit of doing that. Saying or choosing the wrong action and making everyone around him upset. 

Trying to get comfortable with Cas in the same room was more difficult than Dean was willing to admit. It wasn’t Cas’ fault by any means, it was more of Dean trying to figure out a way for him to fall asleep with his heart pounding. By some magical power, Cas didn’t notice the hunter’s struggle or, if he did, he thankfully didn’t say anything. 

Once he was semi-comfortable, Dean heard Cas rustle behind him. Dean was about to ask what he was doing until the lights in the room went off, covering everything it a blanket of darkness. There was more faint rustling of Cas settling down onto the other motel bed- watching over Dean like a guardian angel. 

“Goodnight, Dean.” The hunter smiled, deciding not to comment on the whole creepily- watching -Dean- sleep situation. 

“Night, Cas.” Maybe it was the strange sense of safety he felt at having Cas watch over him, knowing that nothing will harm him throughout the night as long as his trench-coated warrior is here, that caused Dean’s body to shut down the moment he closed his eyes.

In his dream, he opened his eyes to two glowing eyes staring down at him. Dean was sprawled out on the ground, facing the sky but a towering giant hovered over the hunter, blocking the sky. Craning his neck, Dean could see that the monster was on its knees, probably its only way to get an affective look at Dean’s ant-like size. 

It was odd. Dean wasn’t sure which head he should pay more attention to and if there even was a dominant head. Maybe the thing didn’t care? Either way, the way it was staring at Dean with humble curiosity and concern confused the hunter. Dean should be unnerved. There’s a giant monster that could squash him like a fly without any effort but there was no ounce of fear in his bones. 

“Uh...you’re not going to eat me, are you?” Dean asked. The wolf head noted him inquisitively, giving a small sniff as if scenting Dean from thirty feet in the air. The zebra head shook its head as it snorted and the dear remained impassive. 

Despite the lack of response, the human head tilted its head. It’s eyes stared at Dean as if he didn’t understand why the hunter believed he’d hurt him. 

“Can I interpret that as a, “yes you’re not going to eat me”?” The white head nodded- it’s giant proportions moving slowly in Dean’s vision. “Awesome.” The wolf’s ears perked like a happy dog. A small poke of joy poked at Dean’s emotions reading the happy expressions from each head. It was strange, surreal, but great. 

Colossal wings flapped similarly to how a bird would ruffle theirs. The only difference was Dean was hit with a huge gust of wind, forcing him to close his eyes. His dream-like state mustered the illusion of chills and Dean suddenly felt very cold. The wolf head lowered it’s ears as a way of showing the action was unintentional, and the hunter gave the canine a small smile before pushing himself up.

“Alright. Assuming that I’m not on the dinner menu, where do you wanna go big guy?” Dean was sure that if the giant had a tail, it’d be wagging because every head seemed delighted to finally have a partner to travel with. Which was an odd thought, seeing as Dean’s asleep and this creature is a figment of his imagination.

The giant turned its body both ways, gazing in every direction as he tried to figure out which direction to head. After a few minutes, the giant took a step, shaking the entire ground beneath its feet. Dean unfortunately lost balance and ended up back on the ground. 

“Ow.” The monster instantly stopped, heads gazing at Dean apologetically with a mixture of discouragement. Dean immediately felt bad for not being more stable. The hunter was about to comfort the beast (not that he was expecting to successfully do so. Literally. How the hell was he supposed to pat the thing on the back and explain that it wasn’t its fault?) when the deer’s ears flickered in thought. 

Once again, the monster slowly lowered itself down to its knees. Dean knew it was trying to be light on it’s feet but the ground still shook with enough power to knock him down. This time, Dean stayed on the ground where he knew it was safe and stared at the giant in confusion. Silently, the giant held out it’s hand that must’ve been the size of a football field out in front of Dean. 

Oh. Dean saw where this was going.

“Uh...I’m not so sure…” The wolf’s ears flickered back, giving Dean an actual puppy dog face.

Dammit.

“Alright. Alright. Jesus. Did you learn that from, Sam or something?” Dean slowly got back up. Hesitantly, he climbed into the giant’s hand. He wasn’t going to lie, this whole situation was weird. This was something straight out of a fairytale but instead of a lost princess you had a stubborn hunter and this time the big friendly giant had four heads.

Surprisingly, sitting in the palm of a monster that could crush him at any moment wasn’t so bad- especially since each head looked so freaking happy. 

Unsurprisingly, getting lifted up a little over seven hundred feet in the air nearly gave Dean a heart attack. It was one of those moments where, (a) Dean should’ve saw this coming, and (b) he was still terrified of heights even in his dreams. 

The moment it seemed like all the air was out of his lungs, chest aching terribly as it tried to contain the erratic breathing of his heart- he suddenly felt placid. Fear, that’d been there seconds ago had rushed out just as quickly as it came. It was so sudden that it captivated Dean’s heart in a completely different way than his fear of heights did. The feeling was something Dean felt often (not as much as he would’ve liked) and he’d never admit it outloud. What was that feeling? Dean wasn’t quite so sure himself.

Not trusting himself with looking back down towards the ground and how it was probably similar to a view from an airplane, Dean kicked back in the giant's hand and took the opportunity to look at each head up close. From the ground they seemed somewhat normal in comparison to a normal person but of course, that was from a thousand feet away. In reality, they were just as huge as the giant. 

Dean wanted to ask it a question. It was a simple question, nothing Sammy level. He wasn’t going to nerd out over how this thing lived or how the hell it’s alive in the first place. Dean just wanted to know if it had a name and if there was some answer as to why it was in his dreams. Maybe his head had a plan. Some sort of intricate story that required two separate dreams to carry out. But the hunter wasn’t sure how to ask it. Could the giant even reply? Dean knew that the monster understood him but it never gave verbal responses. It just showed it’s emotions through its many heads and called it a day.

There wasn’t a whole lot Dean could do, so he took turns staring at the sky and the dream created giant. He wasn’t entirely sure how long it walked for before it was slowly lowering Dean to the ground. 

Dean carefully hopped onto the ground. There were in the middle of a spacious field covered in yellow flowers with a blue and white mountain range in the background. Evergreen trees were speckled here and there but for the most part it was just flowers shining in the bright sun. 

“I didn’t realize we were so close to a field.” Dean commented. He had to admit, it was a beautiful sight. Was this where the giant had planned on going originally? It’s not a bad scenery to spend his dreams. Everything seemed peaceful enough that Dean was willing to bask in the blazing sun in the middle of a floral field if it meant getting some solid rest. 

Now, Dean hadn’t thought about what the giant might’ve wanted to do once they reached their destination. Staring out into the distance, the hunter was trying to rack his brain for what the giant could possibly want to do all the way out here. There wasn’t much a being it’s size could do but going to the middle of a field? Maybe it just enjoyed the serene feel and beautiful landscape. 

Out of everything, there was one thing Dean realized he was expecting.

Without any warning whatsoever, the giant dropped to its knees slowly. Dean leaned on his knees to keep his balance as the ground shook under the giant’s weight and raised an eyebrow in question at his monstrous friend.

“What-” Buzz.

Dean startled away from the noise that brushed past his ear, barely catching the small insect that had caused it. Casually, the honey bee in question rested upon Dean’s shoulder, and all the hunter could think was please don’t sting me.

He tried not to react badly when he happened to catch his new dream friend staring at him. The wolf’s ears were perked, blue eyes started in his direction with joyful wonder, and the stag and zebra both flickered their ears. Dean glanced from the giant to the bee on his shoulder before looking back at his friend with a grin. “You dork. You big- giant freaking dork.” 

More bees buzzed past Dean. The honey bee on his shoulder figured that the hunter was indeed not a flower and flew away to one of the many authentic flowers. The giant followed the bees with such interest it was adorable. It was like watching a puppy get intrigued with every new item or person you throw their way. 

“Bees?” Dean asked, eyes shining with mirth. The giant shuffled on its knees bashfully. “Hey, that’s cool.” And freaking adorable. “Is that why you wanted to come here?” The white head nodded, staring down at the ground as if Dean would be disappointed by the situation. “What’d I just say? Bees are cool in their own way. A friend of mine really likes bees so I can’t say the little insects haven’t grown on me.” 

The giant seemed very grateful about that. 

Dean never would’ve imagined that watching a thousand foot giant eagerly try and make friends with bees would be the highlight of his dream. Nothing much besides his friend trying to follow the bees every move happened. The entire dream consisted of Dean laughing each time the bees flew away and watching the excitement come back onto each head as another bee came into it’s view.

For the second time this month, Dean woke up without any hassle. Despite the uncomfortable comforter and mattress of the cheap hotel room, everything felt great. The weight of the hunt didn’t rest on his shoulders or whatever nightmares normally plague him. 

He glanced around the room to see Sam passed out into the bed that Cas had once sat on. 

Dean looked around for any sign of the angel and found a small note on the nightstand beside his bed.

You two really shouldn’t work yourselves to exhaustion. I’ll seek to it that the werewolf is dealt with while you and Sam rest. Don’t worry, I’ll return with food.  
-Cas

Dean felt bad that they were leaving the case up to Cas’ alone. The poor guy shouldn’t be called in every time they need something. Don’t get Dean wrong, he loves having Cas’ company and working a case is always his go to excuse to call the angel. Was it the best tactic? Probably not, but Dean’s all out of ideas and he’s afraid Cas won’t show if he’s not given a reason. 

Yawning, Dean laid back out on the bed and stared at the ceiling. He waited for either Cas to walk through the door or for Sam to wake up.

***

Four weeks later, that adorable giant has yet to appear in Dean’s dreams again but overall, these past few weeks haven’t been terrible.

Most of the time they’ve spent at the bunker (him, Sam, AND Cas- Dean should note), hanging out and watching movies. It wasn’t until nearing the third week Garth called them, explaining that some hunters over in Missouri have been struggling with this one monster and asked for their assistance. They accepted the case without much thought. While Dean drove Sam researched and Cas stared out the window, giving his input every now and then whenever Sam asked a question in hopes of the angel knowing some answer. 

Dean was pretty much lost on most of their conversation. They spouted tons of new lore that Dean wasn’t even going to attempt to learn at the moment. His brain wasn’t in the game to absorb every word either of them said but he did enjoy the feel of three people in the car. Before, having Sam by his side was enough but the comfortable presence of the angel in the back seat sparked another happiness in Dean. 

They arrived at the motel a day later. Sam and Dean unpacked their things while Cas got all of the lore books from the trunk and unloaded them onto the small table near the kitchen portion of the room. 

Driving alway had a way of relaxing Dean but it was still tiring afterwards. He wanted nothing more than to stop by a diner and order a large plate of fries but it was only three in the afternoon and they agreed to get dinner after their first round of questioning. There first stop was going to be at a local church where the priest witnessed their key suspect get brutally murdered before him. All the hunters before them said that he was a loose end and provided no real information or insight to the actual issue of the case but Dean was hoping that Cas might be able to pick anything up.

Dean had already changed into his FBI suite when he noticed Sam still hadn’t changed.

“I’m gonna hang back and do some more research.” Sam said, already settling into the uncomfortably small chair at the table. 

“Didn’t you do enough research on the way here?” Dean asked. “You barely looked away from your phone or any of the books. I knew you were a bookworm, Sammy, but this is a little extreme.” Sam rolled his eyes.

“Garth called us as a last resort.” Sam started. “We have no clue why hunters keep failing or what the hell this could be. I’m trying to make sure we don’t go in blind like everyone else.” The older brother groaned. His brother had a point. All in all, Dean was just glad Sam hadn’t forced them all to read.

“Alright, Sammy. Me and Cas will go talk to the father, then. Come on, Cas.” Dean opened the door for the angel before shutting it. 

Having Cas in the passengers seat was a whole nother feeling. Dean loved having Sam in the front seat with him but when Cas sat up there it was different. A good different. 

The church was small and the parking lot was nearly empty when they arrived. Dean got out of the impala first, Cas in tow, and they both made their way up the staircase and into the house of God. There have been many occasions where Dean had to enter a church for a case, and before he met heaven, he used to think it was nice how people could devote their lives to being good people and believing in a peaceful afterlife where there’s always someone watching over them. He could never believe in God himself, due to everything he’s seen.

Then he met angels and found out what assholes they were. At first, Dean could barely stand Cas but he could easily tell that the angel had a strong belief in his father’s words. Then, Dean ran into Uriel, and then Zachariah, and it was then that Dean realized what dicks angels were. 

Thank God, Cas was the one to pull him out of hell. Dean couldn’t imagine his life without the dork and especially the kind of force and annoyance any other angel would’ve inflicted on him to say yes to Michael. Well, maybe Alfie wouldn’t have been that bad. He seemed like a pretty easy going angel for the most part. He wasn’t hell bent on taking Kevin and the tablet forcefully. The poor guy just went with the punches and did things the way Dean was sure heaven was supposed to do them.

“Not to be disrespectful but out of all the churches I’ve seen this one takes the cake.” Dean commented. “I’ve had my handful of creepy looking, dark tinted churches. This is a nice change.” All of the murals were shining as the sun came through, allowing for the entire inside to be filled with sunlight. Shadows didn’t seem to exist and everyone looked happy. 

“Every church is...unique. It probably doesn’t help that the only time you ever step into one you’re trying to solve a murder and hunt for a supernatural creature.” Cas replied. He gave the Winchester a look of amusement. “Underneath the awful you and your brother hunt, this is what churches are supposed to be like. They’re supposed to act like a gateway and beacon for those who want to talk to god so they represent the light of heaven.” 

Huh. Learn something new everyday.

Dean loved the way Cas sounded and looked when he was reminiscing over what Heaven was supposed to be like and what their mission originally was. It was the sort of hope that people came to church looking for but Dean secretly knew there was no one upstairs that really cared. That’s why Dean still didn’t believe in God even though he met the guy. Dean wasn’t going to believe in a deadbeat God or a bunch of angels upstairs that only wanted to do things their own twisted way. There was only one heavenly figure he held on a high pedestal and had strong belief in.

And that was Cas.

Though he’d never say it out loud.

“Welcome. I don’t believe I’ve seen you gentlemen around before.” A short, elderly gentlemen in a priest outfit greeted them with an honest smile. 

“Father Cory?” Cas asked. The preacher nodded.

Dean grabbed the fake FBI badge from his pocket and nudged Cas to do the same. The angel struggled less professionally and Dean had to bite the inside of his cheek to keep from grinning at the sight of Cas’ crooked badge. 

“We’re here to ask you a few question concerning the death of Merit Brand.” The polite smile had fallen from the Father’s face. 

“Of course. Please, let’s talk somewhere more private.” He glanced at the people sitting in the pews, who were trying not to glance in their direction. Dean nodded and both him and Cas followed the preacher to a room near the back of the church. 

The questioning went by just as well as expected. They didn’t find out much since there wasn’t a whole lot to go off of. As they walked back out into the altar room, Dean asked Cas if he caught anything the hunter missed.

“Sadly the priest didn’t seem to have enough evidence to lead us in any particular direction. Though it was dark he still alluded to the culprit as a monster and he believed it had fairly inhuman abilities, I’m positive this is definitely going to be a difficult case.” Cas shared. The word monster seemed to have multiple meanings to Dean lately. He still thought of the creatures that go bump in the night but his mind couldn’t help but wander to his friendly monster that liked to appear in his dreams.

It almost brought a wave of sadness. Dean hadn't seen his mysterious friend for weeks now and his dreams never seemed to be the same without the big guy. Thankfully, Dean still didn’t have vivid nightmares but he didn’t have good dreams either. 

A mural off to the side caught Dean’s attention. Unlike the other ones that portrayed angels as men and women with wings, this one was replaced with an odd creature. The one in particular had light grey skin and huge wings. It’s body shape reminded Dean all to much of his dream friend.

“Dean?” The hunter glanced at his friend who pulled him out of his thoughts. “Is something wrong?” 

“Cas, what’s that?” Dean asked, pointing towards the much smaller glass image. It was as if someone didn’t want to bring too much attention to this particular idea or representation of christianity. 

The angel frowned but looked to where the hunter was pointing. “That would be an semi-accurate portrayal of an angel’s true form.” Cas explained. “I’ve told you before that angels look nothing like their vessels. My trueform is approximately the size of the Chrysler building. Every angel is different in their own way, and many times you can tell the difference due to the amount of wings or heads that angel possesses. That mural would be of the Archangel Michael, your least favorite being as of right now.” The angel attempted to joke towards the end to lighten the mood. 

Whereas the hunter appreciated the attempt, it wasn’t enough. There was a little relief that Michael didn’t leave an impression on him and his dreams to that extent. And if what Dean was dreaming about was an angel, then who the hell was it and what did they want?

“Humans can’t see true forms though, right?” Dean asked. Cas shook his head.

“No. It’s most likely that another angel painted the image for the church to have a bit more accuracy. If humans were to bare witness to an angel’s trueform than they’d suffer the same fate your friend, Pamela had.” There was a hint of remorse in Cas’ voice. Dean wasn’t given a chance to tell his friend it wasn’t his fault but Cas had already changed the subject. “Why are you so interested?”

Dean did everything not to stutter nervously. “What? A guy can’t be interested about what his best friend actually looks like?” There was that freaking look again. Cas was the master at summoning a look that could be described as “I can see right through you, assbutt. Don’t lie to me.”

At least. Dean liked to imagine that’s the insult Cas would go for.

It was by far Dean’s favorite.

The hunter sighed. “Cas. It’s nothing, I swear.” Cas opened his mouth to object but Dean wouldn't let him. “Trust me, angel.” The tips of Dean’s ears burned brightly.

Dammit. Dammit dammit dammit. Way to go Winchester. You better retreat now.

Which is exactly what Dean did. He ignored the surprise in Cas’ eyes and jogged right out of the church to the impala. As if Dean was willing to talk about how he just gave Cas a fucking pet name without even deliberately trying to. It just slipped out and now Dean wants nothing more than to drive himself off a cliff.

Well. This’ll make for an awkward ride home.

***

Dean opened his eyes to a park full of children. He sat on a bench, confused before realizing he was asleep. 

Okay. He was still confused.

His brain seemed to enjoy playing strange pranks on Dean while he slept. Instead of giving him normal dreams or nightmares it alway seemed to sprinkle in a few chaos and odd, strange, incomprehensible dreams that made no sense whatsoever.

The threes behind him creaked and shuffled. There was no wind, and only one possible answer came to Dean’s mind. When he turned around, he tried not to feel too intimidated by the four heads staring back at him. They all seemed happy, not having strolled through Dean’s dreams in awhile.

“Oh. Hey.” Dean waved awkwardly. He was afraid that the monster’s mood would do a one eighty and decide to tear the hunter limb from limb. Since he wasn’t sure if this giant was a figment of imagination or a monster he accidently picked up from a hunt a few states over. Maybe this is why he should’ve told Sam and Cas. 

There was the suspicion that this was either a monster or some wacked out angel that thought trotting though Dean’s mind was a good idea. Neither of those options seemed all that great to Dean.

“Haven’t seen you around in awhile. What’ve you been up to?” Dean asked. He wanted to get an actual answer. One that could lead him to figuring out what, or who, the hell this thing was. The hunter didn’t want a partial threat his his brain. He’s already housed one angel before. He wasn’t willing to do so ever again.

Especially an angel that comes and goes as they please. They could probably take over Dean’s entire mind within three seconds. Leaving him to the same fate Michael did. 

Like always, the giant didn’t reply. Dean rolled his eyes and looked back out towards the park. An empty bench sat besides the one Dean was on. This entire scene was familiar. Dean looked back towards the creature, and his surroundings.

Alright. Where the hell were they?

Dean had this feeling back out on that road he sped down. He’s definitely been here before. When? He couldn’t quite place that. And why it was so significant to his brain? An even bigger loss.

“Okay, buddy.” Dean was bummed that he couldn’t trust this creature completely. He wanted to with every fiber in his body but the uncertainty was enough to put Dean’s mind back in place. The hunter couldn’t trust this creature. Not when he had no clue why it was here. He’s never seen an angels true form and technically he shouldn’t even be able to, and yet here he is. Standing in front of something that resembles the same species and body shape as Michael’s image (one that Cas gave the red seal of approval for accuracy). 

When he wakes up, he should really consult Sam and Cas about this.

That’d be the smart thing to do.

...But is it the Dean Winchester thing to do?

No.

Dean cursed himself mentally and leaned back on the wooden park bench. “You wouldn’t happen to be one of the bad guys, would you?” The hunter asked. Is this a bright conversation to have with something that’s currently in his dreams and can probably control when Dean leaves. 

The white head tilted it’s head, probably wondering where Dean got that assumption from. It wasn’t until the wolf whined that Dean instantly felt bad.

“Alright, you big softy. I didn’t mean anything by it.” The hunter instantly tried to undo the damage he’d done. His giant friend seemed doubtful and uncertain that Dean meant what he said, which was kind of true. Dean didn’t want this monster to get upset just in case it was a bad guy but at the same time he really hadn’t meant to hurt the thing’s feelings.

Dammit. I think I’ve accidentally become friends with this thing.

Dean tried not to groan. He was such an idiot. Then again, he’s prone to making mistakes and having feelings without meaning to so he really shouldn’t be this surprised. Falling in love with his best friend? Accident. Considering the King of Hell/ scottish bastard his friend? Definitely unintentional. Thinking that the giant invading his dreams is a dork and wanting to be friends with it? Very much accidental.

The Earth beneath his feet shook. Dean glanced at his monstrous friend only to see all four heads focused somewhere behind him. The hunter felt a pang of fear in his abdomen. Something had sparked the wolf’s ears to perk up and go flat against his head, nose crinkle, throat letting out a menacing growl. The deer and Zebra snorted, most likely stomping their hooves if they had any, and the white head didn’t take his eyes off whatever caused the noise. 

The giant rose from the ground, and Dean was struck with the thought that he probably shouldn’t be right in its ginormous feet’s way.

When the culprit came into view, Dean’s eyes widened and his heart sped up. No. no no no no no. Dean didn’t want to believe what he saw. There was nothing good about the monster’s light grey skin, eight snowy white wings, or giant sword. The hunter especially didn’t like how his friend looked miniscule compared to the other. 

Only one thing came to Dean’s mind and it was: Not Michael.

His friend pulled out a sword (Dean didn’t realize it had one), and stood in front of the hunter. Dean realized that the giant was trying to protect him from the other one but the thought didn’t have a chance to fully register before the taller one made the first move.

Michael swung his sword at the giant but it was easily deflected. Everything seemed to move in slow motion as Dean’s dream friend to a powerful step to the side and kicked Michael backwards. The hunter knew that out of the two of them, the archangel was definitely the strongest. But Michael was gone. All of this was a dream where anything could happen- and here, both of them were equally matched. 

Well, besides the obvious height difference. 

The giant flipped its sword around and aimed for Michael’s abdomen. The archangel dodged it and took the opportunity to take a swing at the giant but Dean’s friend grabbed Michael's hand used his difflected power to knock the archangel back a few steps. It didn’t get the chance to propel Michael’s sword into the archangel’s stomach but it bought it enough time to turn towards Dean and motion with a swing of a hand for the hunter to run.

Dean didn’t have to be told twice.

He booked it into the woods. All of the kids had disappeared off the play structure but that was the least of Dean’s worries at the moment. He focused on running, leaning on trees while the two angels fought like robots from a movie. The hunter wanted to turn back every now and then to make sure his angelic protector was okay but thought against it. His friendly giant told him to get out of there, and was determined to put Dean’s safety first.

How did he think that dork was a bad guy?

In reality, Dean shouldn’t have been able to run as far as he did but in the dream world, the laws of physics and sensibility didn’t apply. The hunter could jump off a cliff and still survive. It was the good thing about being in a dream. The bad thing was he didn’t know to what the extent his dreams worked like normal dreams in this situation. If angels could appear in his dream did that mean he was vulnerable? Did Dean have to worry about getting killed or fracturing his bones?

He didn’t stop running until he was sure he was out of sight and far away from the warzone. Dean was breathing heavily, heart beating a mile per second. 

The hunter waited. He waited for any signs of waking up and for any indication that the fight was over. It felt like hours before he started to feel the heavy steps of an angel’s trueform head towards him. Just in case, Dean hid within a mound of trees, trying to become invisible to the eyes above. The true form version of Michael was the worst version of the archangel that could possibly hunt Dean down. It was terrifying knowing that there was nothing Dean could do to protect himself. 

Dean breathed a sigh of relief when he heard the soft sniffs of his favorite wolf head (yes, Dean realized how weird that sounded). He stepped out from underneath the canopy of trees and waved up to his big friend (screw it. This thing’s his friend now). The hunter instantly frowned at the sight of his friend.

Blood seeped out of a huge gash on the wolf’s muzzle, even deeper scratches littered the entire torso. Crimson dripped from somewhere behind the giant’s back- most likely from its wings. It was an awful sight and Dean instantly felt bad that the only reason it was injured was because Michael decided to plague his dreams once again and come after the hunter.

He wasn’t given a chance to ask how badly it was injured before he was pulled out of his subconscious. Dean awoke to bright rays of sunshine sneaking through the curtains of the motel room and over his eyes. 

Dean couldn’t help but think how irrational it was to be worried about something that didn’t even exist.

Or, at least, he didn’t think it did.

***

Not even a day after Dean’s dramatic dream, Cas confronted him about what happened at the church. The hunter should’ve seen this coming. He was pretty suspicious and Cas had every right to be worried. Dean had a habit of lying when things were bad, for instance about having the Mark of Cain. Back then, Cas also read him like an open book and knew within seconds what was wrong.

Dean really didn’t like talking about his feelings or himself. He was the worst topic.

“Dean, something is wrong.” It took every ounce of his willpower not to roll his eyes. “There’s something you’re not sharing and it’s...what’s the term?... ‘eating you up inside’.” The iconic air quotes nearly made Dean laugh despite the topic.

“Cas. I asked you to trust me.” Dean stared evenly into his friend’s eyes. “I’m fine. I can handle this on my own.”

“That’s the problem, Dean.” Cas grounded out. “You always put everything on your shoulders and never allow anyone to help you. You’re strong, and you have nothing to prove. If you think you have to prove something by carrying everything yourself then you’re wrong. Me and Sam are here to help you.” Dean was almost inclined to believe him.

But that’s not how John Winchester taught his sons.

“Cas-” 

“What’s going on?” Sam asked, turning around the corner of the motel. Cas gave Dean an even look, practically ordering the hunter to just say it.

“Nothin-”

“Dean’s struggling with something and he’s insisting he can take care of it himself.” The hunter in question made a noise in protest. “I’m sorry, Dean but you need help.” He would’ve argued but Sam spoke.

“What’re you trying to hide?” Oh, no. Dean was not having this conversation. It wasn’t even terrible. Having an angelic true form guarding your dreams isn’t a bad thing, right? 

“I’m not having this conversation.”

“Dean Winchester, you and I both know nothing good ever comes out of hiding things.” Cas growled. “I’m also positive you and Sam have the same experience.” 

“Come on, Dean.” Sam squared his shoulders. The younger Winchester felt bad that he hadn’t noticed something was wrong with his brother. 

“Like I said-” Dean’s phone buzzed in his pocket, cutting off whatever he was going to say. When he pulled it out, Jack’s name lit up the screen and he flashed it in Sam and Cas’ faces. The hunter took a few steps back and opened his phone, putting it to his ear. “Hey, Jack. How’s spending time with Mary going?”

“It’s great!” Came Jack’s enthusiastic reply. The young kid went into vivid explanation about everything him and Mary have done while Sam and Cas glanced at each other knowingly.

Dean Winchester was the most stubborn person they knew.

“Do you think it has something to do with, Michael?” Sam asked once he was sure Dean was out of earshot. Cas frowned, staring at Dean for a minute before turning to Sam. 

“I’m not positive but possibly. We both know what it’s like to have an Archangel in control. I can’t imagine how it must’ve been for Dean, because unlike us he believe that Michael would release him afterwards. Of course, he knew it was a risk but when we both said yes to Lucifer there was no doubt what we were in for.” Cas said. “There’s also the thought that every angel takes care of their vessel in a different way. Lucifer kept me locked up in the bunker watching TV, I kept James Novak asleep most of the time.”

Sam shifted. “Dean explained that it was like he was drowning and how scary it was. I don’t think that’s what this is about though.” The youngest Winchester thought for a moment. “I don’t think it’d even be when Michael was banging inside his head all the time.”

“Two days ago when we first arrived to this town and Dean and I went to go question the pastor, Dean showed a strange fascination in angel true forms.” Cas shared. “That’s when I started to realize something was wrong. He’s questioned it once but that was years ago.” 

Sam sighed. “You know, Dean. He’d rather die than tell us what’s wrong.”

“That’s what I’m afraid of.” Cas said.

***

Dean almost refused to go to sleep. He was tempted to down several cups of coffee and work his ass off in an effort to stay awake. The hunter was just about to put his plan into action when he realized how worried it’s make Sam and Cas. He’d told them that he was fine but he knew they didn’t believe him. They had every right not to.

In all honesty, Dean thinks he’s fine. Having the true form of a random angel in his head can’t be that bad. 

That sounded pretty bad.

So, in order not to bring too much attention to his best friend and younger brother, he went to sleep. He held out till one am, but he still fell asleep.

Just like all the other times, he appeared in his dream outside. The only difference was the sun wasn’t shining but the moon ignited the night sky, thousands of stars millions of light years away dotted the sky. Dean found himself in the middle of a field, not too far away from a dirt road. When he lifted himself up off the ground, he realized something else.

Ten feet away from him was a barn.

Curious, Dean walked towards the abandoned structure. He pushed open the heavy wooden doors and looked into the all too familiar set up.

On a table off to the side was a pile of weapons. Every signal that Dean knew of at the time painted every inch of the walls. Glass littered the floor from the grand entrance his friend had made.

Dean walked into the barn, that night flooding through his brain. Bobby had reluctantly agreed to go with him. Well, that wasn’t exactly how it went. It was more of, Bobby insisted that Dean didn’t go alone but still believed he should’ve told Sam before trying to summon a very powerful demon.

Which didn’t end up being a demon at all.

At the time, Dean thought Angels weren’t a whole lot better. But Cas? That was probably the best thing to come out of the Apocalypse. Dean’s friendship with Cas.

Dean smiled at the memories of Cas when he still had that stick up his ass. He didn’t understand nearly as much as he does now, and yet, he’s still Cas. Even though one of them was hellbent of following heaven’s orders and the other could care less about what heaven thinks, they’re both clueless dorks that go from “I couldn’t hurt a fly” to “I’ll smite everyone in this entire room” within seconds.

Why was he dreaming about this?

Earthquakes created by his favorite giant rumbled the barn. Those four big heads stared at Dean through the open doors of the barn.

...wait.

Dean’s heart dropped to his stomach.

How the fuck did I miss that?

The hunter’s heart was beating like crazy. “Cas?”

The wolf barked in response like a giant dog. The zebra whinnied and the stag snorted. All of the heads looked excited that Dean finally recognized who they were and the hunter was having a mini panic attack.

And then it all made sense; the interest in bees, staring at Dean 24/7, worrying about Dean’s safety over his own, the brightest blue eyes Dean’s ever seen.

“Ho-oly shit.” Dean ran a hand through his hair. “Why the hell am I so stupid?” The wolf growled at that. The hunter couldn’t help but laugh. “Won’t even let me put myself down. God. I’d say that it all makes sense, why I was able to trust you so fast or why I felt so safe next to you but that’d be something out of a fuckin’ halmark and I’m terrified that’s actually you.” All of the heads tilted in some way.

Dean wanted to wake up. He wanted to pull him and Cas out of the motel room and talk to him. There was so much he wanted to confront the angel about but he was stuck his dream state. 

“Is it weird that I still have a crush on you despite your gigantic form?” Dean wondered aloud. “I feel like that’s kinda weird but I can’t bring myself to find you any less attractive and adorable.” The hunter didn’t know why he was saying these things. Maybe because if he doesn’t practice now than how the hell was he going to talk to Cas when he woke up?

Was Dean planning on telling Cas he loves him?

“Holy shit.” Dean exclaimed for the second time. “Is this my subconscious’ way of telling me I’m ready?”

Of course, he didn’t receive an answer. But what did happen was his brain decided to kick himself awake. Was Dean happy about that? Yes. Was he emotionally prepared? Probably not. Was he still going to go through with what he was planning to do? Why the hell not.

Dean shot out of bed, careful not to wake his sleeping brother. Cas was sitting next to the window, reading something on his phone when he turned towards Dean, confusion written all over his face. The hunter, not caring about his state of dress (boxers and a t-shirt), grabbed the angel’s arm without any words and pulled him out into the warm summer night. They were the only ones at the motel and everyone in the town went inside at eight. 

“Dean, what are-”

“I’ve been having some...odd dreams.” Dean felt bad for cutting the angel off but he marked it as payback for earlier. “I don’t know how to explain them exactly or if I’m even correct here but there’s this...giant.” The hunter bit his lip. Cas watched him, silently. “He was very tall. I mean skyscraper tall. He was nice, which was odd at first, and pretty adorable.” Cas squinted, not used to Dean using that kind of endearment.

“But there was something about him that reminded me of someone I really, really care about. And it’s not Sam.” Dean added quickly before Cas got any ideas. “This dork liked to watch bees in a giant field of flowers, protect me against other giants and he always stared into me. It was all very familiar but I couldn’t place it. Then, I saw that mural at the church of Michael. You said that’s how angels actually look but they can have varying heads and all those details.” The hunter swallowed nervously. “Well my giant friend had the same physic. The only difference was instead of one head he had four. And instead of eight wings he had six beautiful black wings that were frayed but nonetheless beautiful.”

Cas was staring at him with the same lost face that he had at the brothel. Dean prayed that he wasn’t way out of his league here.

Knowing that Cas is a multidimensional celestial wavelength that’s as old as the Earth and deserves far better than Dean really didn’t help.

“The wolf head was pretty adorable, to be honest. You told me those were angel true forms and I don’t know if it was the eyes or some weird connection I had with the thing, I considered him a friend. And then, this last dream, I was at the barn where we first met and it all came to me. You wouldn’t happen to have a wolf, stag, zebra, and human-esque for heads, would you?”

The poor angel couldn’t muster any words. He just stared at Dean incredulously and nodded. Despite the expression, Dean grinned- pure joy all over his face. It was infectious and made Cas smile despite looking throughout thrown through a loop.

“You know, I love you for who you are and if at any point you’re suddenly concerned that I only like you because you’re in a human’s body that ain’t it. Your trueform is handsome and adorable and I’m not surprised. But that’s just a plus.” Dean complimented. “I’ve been meaning to say that for awhile, actually. I think my brain got to the point where it was shoving me to use my words for once.” He laughed nervously.

Cas was staring at him with a new emotion in his eyes. Dean was suddenly afraid he did phrased things very, very wrong until the angel crowded into his personal space and kissed him softly on the lips.

All caution was thrown out the window. For once, Dean’s heart pounded and he was filled with excitement, and happiness. The hunter leaned in, gently cupping the side of Cas’ face. 

When Cas pulled away, he gave Dean that rare grin- the one that crinkled the skin underneath his eyes and lightened the blue in his eyes even more. “I love your soul as well, Dean.”

Dean was about to kiss him again before the motel door flung open. Sam stood there, hair wild from sleep. He rubbed his eyes, staring at them. “Am I dreaming?”

Cas and Dean glanced at each other. “Uh...no.” Dean eventually said.

“Alright. I’m happy for you two. Either of you hurts the other and I’ll kick your ass. Go love each other you dorks.” Sam gave a tired version of the “brother speech” before turning around and shutting the door. Dean made out the silent “fucking finally” Sam muttered.

That wasn’t exactly how he was planning to come out to his brother, but Dean felt lighter anyways. Sam approved of his sexuallity, Cas reciprocate his feelings, everything was great.

Dean couldn’t help but kiss his angel again.


End file.
